Ahhhh St. Patrick’s Day. This is ALSO my sorority’s Founder’s Day, so long story short, double whammy on the partying.
Warning: This story I’m about to tell you is not flattering at all. Neither are the pictures.
My freshman year of college, my first real-life encounter with St Pat’s, I had a mystery bacterial infection raging in my throat and I was bedridden for the entire weekend. Even my social recluse I-don’t-drink roommate developed an Irish spirit and came back raging drunk after two beers and soaked in the third.
It wasn’t until junior year of college that I claimed a (really) memorable St Patrick’s Day story. This was the semester I’d insisted on taking several three hour classes late at night (6-9:30 pm), and it often left me with a laaaarge break in between. It was one of these classes where the professor happened to schedule a tiny little thing called a midterm on March 17.
During my break on this one fateful day, my boyfriend “talked” me into heading over to a friend’s house, where there was guaranteed to be a keg and video games. So while he got his Grand Theft Auto on, I did a little something that looks like this:
And yes, these pictures are actual documentation, not a representation.
At some point, I managed to spill beer all over myself and was handed a pair of sweatpants to wear while my pants dried. Mind you, the friend who’s house we were at is a 6’7 hockey player, and I am 5’2. It was his sweatpants I was wearing.
Imagine my shock, when not so soon after, I was reminded I had a MIDTERM in fifteen minutes!
My pants were still soaked in beer, so I grabbed my things and ran to campus wearing my friend’s XXL sweatpants and reeking of grain alcohol. Yep. Classy classy move.
When I got to campus, my heart was pounding, part from running, part from drankin’, part from knowing I was NOT going to pass this midterm.
So what did I do?
I hightailed it to the caf, pulled out my laptop, and withdrew from the class. Yes, during the midterm.
Then I went back to my friend’s house and kept drinking.
This story is slightly infamous in my circle of friends. Yes, everybody thought it was awesome.
This story is a classic example of MY LIFE AS A SORORITY PRESIDENT.
This story is TOTALLY NOT my life anymore!
But this story is still one of my favorites!
No, honestly, I do not regret dropping the class or missing the test because I was drunk. I’d never done anything like that before and I’ve never done anything like that since. I mean, I’ve withdrawn from classes, but not because I was too drunk to take the midterm.
Hi Mom! I hope I make you proud!
(My mom doesn’t read my blog, I’m just kidding).
So, now you know, I used to be a drunken sorority girl. Sometimes, but with increasingly less frequency, I can still be.
Happy St. Patrick’s Day! Luck of the Irish be with ya’ll, drink green things, and I’ll see you later!
Do you have a tale of St Patrick’s Day debauchery you’re willing to share? Gritty details here people!
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